that ONE.

some people will always be together. no matter how hard they try to claim their singleness, they are forever tied to at least one person.. the one that first taught us how to love someone outside of our immediate family, yet also the first one that taught us never to trust wholeheartedly again. smh. so why is it so hard to completely break away? is it because we get so comfortable in the things and people we already know and are familiar with? or is it because we will truly and honestly forever love that special ONE? i look around amongst my peers and the couples from high school that are still together to this day are still going strong, whereas the one's that have "broken up" play it off as if they're "not together" on the surface yet still have some deep connection that is so obvious yet they keep denying it. it's like what Chamar Moore says in , A Diary of A Mad Black Woman, "when you really love someone, you can't just be their friend." So True. i mean, no matter how hurt you felt during your break up, or how infatuated you become with the next person.. it will never replace that first love.. and for most people that's something that's just too hard to admit.

--vanilla cream Cupcake

sooner than later

"I forgot to call you on your birthday, you swear you're the last thing on my mind. There is nothing I can do to fix it, all you ever asked me for was time"

feeling a little down I guess you can say... it's been a minute since we've came on here & shared our stories... but I'm feeling like this is something that can't be avoided..

happy birthday to me? thanks.

somebody's someone

so I met someone new so far he's amazing... I don't want to judge him on my past .. I wanna give it all a new try just a fresh start. We actually found out that we have a few mutual friends but we came to compromise that we would just pretend like we didn't so we could learn from each other instead of basing our judgments on what others have to say .. He's so far amazing ...

"When it comes to life and love, why do we believe our worst reviews?"

this is something I want to stop doing .. I wanna just go with the wind & be free ..

I wanna be emancipated & for the first time let life happen instead of thinking about it ..

-mocha cupcake
Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

to you

I still miss you. Its weird to randomly feel this way out of nowhere. After so long you'd think I've let it go. Maybe it's because I never got the closure I needed to help let go. Or is it the unanswered questions left in my head. Questions on why our relationship ended the way it did, why did you act the way you did, did I provoke any of it, was it your personal feelings or was it because you were leaving to school that you felt the need to push me away. These are all questions that still run through my head & that I don't have the courage to ask you. Is your heart still mine ? Do you ever feel what I feel, the kisses & moments we shared do you miss them or even remember them. Getting a wiff of the cologne you wore makes me wanna cry. I'm not one to breakdown but sometimes I wish I could go back in time & fix things so that you could be mine again. When you left I felt lost like nothing would ever be the same for me, like life w/o you couldn't continue. I cried 2 straight weeks. Now I find myself being afraid to be with anyone else, letting anyone get close to me. I've just recently came up with the strength to admit that its fear that keeps me from a new relationship. Its been soooo many years & I still remember everything we shared like it was yesterday. You were the only love I knew. Your departure drove me crazy. So now as I sit here thinking about you trynna get you out of my head I can't help but to wish we were together right now. Just have you by my side.

I don't want to nag you with my questions.. But there's something I need to know.. Do you still care, is your heart still mine like it was back then when you said you loved me & you said one day no matter who came in & out of our lives we would end up together because you KNEW we were meant to be?

-- redvelvet cupcake

sheet music.

he's the lyrics to my melody... his words fit everything about me. we make the perfect TRACK

so why do i find myself focusing on his flaws instead of embracing his delightful attributes? He's made of everything i want physically & mentally ... from his velvet like skin, his mesmerizing scent all the way to his ambitious mind...

i feel like love is more than that bond we see between a man and women.
i feel like love is so much more that its scarcey
its like everything.
i feel like love is everything that you pay attention, thats on your mind when your not even thinking.

time is so precious and we have such a limited amount of it at our dispousal. and we have no clue when it will run out. so the things we choose to pay attention to are the things we love.

so in the midst of this horrible world, take the time to love something or someone.

love is everything.
love is life.

--blueberry Cupcake

his mistakes.

TRUST:

–noun

1.	reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing; confidence.

-- is it fair to compare an innocent man that is doing everything to prove his love & affection, to a man that did nothing but hurt you ? GUILTY, is all you see when you look at him, even before a crime he's already been judged. He's being charged & blamed for pain that he didn't cause you. Isn't it unfair to have to pay for something you didn't break?

most of the time we get so caught up in comparing & judging the next man, that we never stop & realize that this man is here to care for us, not leave us with a scar across our heart. as hard as he may try there's never any winning. i know learning to trust someone after being hurt can be a very difficult step to take but, we need to lift our heads & think that if we base our future on someone that did nothing but waste our time we're never going to get anywhere. so why keep giving these guys such a hard time.. they're not all bad we need to just take a chance & try to find the good in them... if as babies we would of gave up on walking after the first fall where would we be?

we got up & tried it again. so advice to myself & everyone else with trust issues is, just keep trying.. there's a somebody for everyone... just remember don't let the wrongs of someone else tear you guys apart because he just might get tired of paying for something he didn't do. ...

--redvelvet cupcake